Ernesto Quiñonez’s story is not about racism.
Well, that’s not true, Ernesto Quiñonez’s story is about racism. It’s also about bullying, but it’s also about how you react to race, racism, bullying and other evils. Watch the video, it’s shorter than a TED talk, and it’s worth the time.
It’s easy to say “Don’t repay evil for evil,” and, having some distance from Quiñonez’s story, we can easily see where lines were crossed, where evil was repaid with evil. In everyday life, the lines are not so clear, and our temptations to repay evil with evil are subtler.
I’d like to share two quotes with you that may illustrate what I mean.
The first quote is from Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. talking to Christians who were engaged in the fight against racism.
May I say just a word to those of you who are struggling against this evil. Always be sure that you struggle with Christian methods and Christian weapons. Never succumb to the temptation of becoming bitter. As you press on for justice, be sure to move with dignity and discipline, using only the weapon of love. Let no man pull you so low as to hate him. Always avoid violence. If you succumb to the temptation of using violence in your struggle, unborn generations will be the recipients of a long and desolate night of bitterness, and your chief legacy to the future will be an endless reign of meaningless chaos.
In your struggle for justice, let your oppressor know that you are not attempting to defeat or humiliate him, or even to pay him back for injustices that he has heaped upon you. Let him know that you are merely seeking justice for him as well as yourself. Let him know that the festering sore of segregation debilitates the white man as well as the Negro. With this attitude you will be able to keep your struggle on high Christian standards
The second is from Jesus
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,that you may be children of your Father in heaven.
When we are hurt, oppressed and attacked, we are tempted to defeat and humiliate our enemies. We are tempted to consider them less than human, to paint them as misinformed, idiots or malevolent. We are tempted to talk about them this way to people who will agree with us.
We are tempted to hate, but our challenge is to love.
To that effect, here are three suggestions for you to resist the temptation to hate, and embrace the challenge to love
- Pray for the person or people you have conflict with. Don’t just pray that they change their antagonistic behavior. Consider them as full human beings, and pray for something unrelated to the present conflict.
- Do something genuinely good for the person who you disagree with. Not in a way that is trying to curry favor, but something that is genuinely helpful, even if it is unacknowledged.
- Listen to how you and the people around you talk about your “enemies”. Are you using language that implies that they are less human or less moral than you are? Instead of talking about them as bad people, try talking about them as a good people who are currently engaging in bad behavior.
Hate is, unfortunately, cyclical. Whether you do these three things, or you do something else, my hope is that you take some action this week to break that cycle.